[Linux-ivv4] Wochenend-Lektuere

[Stefan Ost]

Liebe Kolleginnen und Kollegen,=20

  nachstehendes fand ich gerade in der September-Ausgabe der=20
Linux-Gazette.

Viel Spa=DF

\Stefan Ost

                  If Operating Systems Ran The Airlines

Different versions of this joke have been floating around the net for t=
he
past couple years, but I found this one especially hilarious. It was fo=
und
by Bruce Kingsland. The original author is unknown.

UNIX Airways

Everyone brings one piece of the plane along when they come to the airp=
ort.
They all go out on the runway and put the plane together piece by piece=
,
arguing non-stop about what kind of plane they are supposed to be build=
ing.

Air DOS

Everybody pushes the airplane until it glides, then they jump on and le=
t
the plane coast until it hits the ground again. Then they push again, j=
ump
on again, and so on ...

Mac Airlines

All the stewards, captains, baggage handlers, and ticket agents look an=
d
act exactly the same. Every time you ask questions about details, you a=
re
gently but firmly told that you don't need to know, don't want to know,=
 and
everything will be done for you without your ever having to know, so ju=
st
shut up.

Windows Air

The terminal is pretty and colorful, with friendly stewards, easy bagga=
ge
check and boarding, and a smooth take-off. After about 10 minutes in th=
e
air, the plane explodes with no warning whatsoever.

Windows NT Air

Just like Windows Air, but costs more, uses much bigger planes, and tak=
es
out all the other aircraft within a 40-mile radius when it explodes.

Linux Air

Disgruntled employees of all the other OS airlines decide to start thei=
r
own airline. They build the planes, ticket counters, and pave the runwa=
ys
themselves. They charge a small fee to cover the cost of printing the
ticket, but you can also download and print the ticket yourself. When y=
ou
board the plane, you are given a seat, four bolts, a wrench and a copy =
of
the Seat-HOWTO.html. Once settled, the fully adjustable seat is very
comfortable, the plan leaves and arrives on time without a single probl=
em,
the in-flight meal is wonderful. You try to tell customers of the other=

airlines about the great trip, but all they can say is, "You had to do =
what
with the seat=3F"